Christopher’s mother’s dementia

Hi, My name is Christopher,I am in the process of trying to get my mother out of an assisted living facility for Alzheimer's patients.I cared for her for a couple years until my sister took over.It was very difficult caring for her at the time and thats why my sister took over.At first I really had no idea what was going on,she started to think that certain things happened that really didn't. I would think that she was just getting her dreams mixed up with reality,and would state this to her. This made her very angry and I know now that this was the wrong approach. We fought all the time and I had no freedom at all.I am going to be brief for now,and just want to say that my sister had a hard time with her as well and put her in the facility which made me very angry.My sister and I no longer communicate.My only communication is through my brother.I visit my dear mother just about every day and it is tearing my heart out to see her so unhappy there and confused.She knows that she is in an institution and really wants to come home.If I suceed at bringing her home,even with the two care givers that I haved lined up,I will be in for the ultimate challenge of my life.I really want to do this and I am asking God for his help and yours as well.My brother is married with two kids,and sister as well.I am single and have not the obligations of my siblings.I am living in my mothers house alone,I am a part time landscaper,I love to cook and eat healthy food,I am in excellent shape.I work out just about every day riding mountain bike and have lots of free time on my hands.My downfall is that I need to work more,and find more social outlets.Currently I'm a loner and have been in this state for about 10 years now. Before my mother moved in with my sister,I was drinking beer to calm my nerves down of the stress of myself and my mother,some days it was so bad that beer came after morning coffee.When my mother moved in with my sister and her codition slowly escalated,so did my drinking,I began to get depressed even more and my sleep patterns were interupted,waking up,going back to sleep.For a couple days I could not sleep,and did not eat.I decided to drink vodka instead of beer and between no sleep or food,I blacked out,totaled my truck,and got a DUI. Today I stand at 120 days sober,attend AA meetings 3 to 4 times a week,feel super healthy and want to be with good people and live a clean,simple life.Most of all I want to be close to God and take care of my mom,she is my blood,my sweetheart and I want her to be happy.She stated to me that the facility is ok,but she wants to be with her family.She said that it is like a dictatorship there,like Hitler pointing his finger.A statement like this may be funny to some folks,but to a loving son it was sad.The other day she was ok.I told her that I was going to an AA meeting and she was thrilled to hear this,and went on to say of the negatives of drinking.Today she wanted to go with me and was very confused,saying that she would fly there in a plane,even though it is only 7 miles away.Its so sad.I also Know what some of you most likely thinking,that I am not ready for such a challenge yet,and most likely you are right,but I am not looking for assumptions,I am not trying to defy the laws of physics or nature,I am looking for strength. PLEASE MEMORIZE THIS FOR I DID:Assumptions are statements about reality which we believe to be true,some of them are obvious and we would dare not question them,but that is exactly why we get blocked when trying to solve a difficult problem.I am not trying to solve Alzheimer's disease,I want to live with it.I have so much to say but it's 2:59 am,April 1st,2011,I need to get sleep.If you have no advice for me,please just say a prayer for my mother and others that are afflicted with this most depressing disease. I also would like to add that I am 51 years old.My brother got me this computer for Christmas,and the fist time I even touched a computer was on January 2,2011. I still have a lot to learn. What the hell is a blog ? Before my mother was put into a home or facility,she spoke to me of the the love she had for her children and grandchildren.Her voice was smooth and calming,filled with love and compassion,but it also had a hint of of worry,as if her time was coming,it istantly painted a picture in my mind and it reached out and touched my soul,it was the first time that I ever painted a picture with words and I called it "The blue an calming water" It is about a mother's love and uses contrast and scenery to express my mood.I would like to share it but it may be too deep for some.I think that I may post it,but I am not sure where to put it.I ask myself "would it have any value to anyone but me ?"Its now 4am and I need sleep for I will be off to see mom soon.